Random Thoughts For The Evening.

Alright, so lately, I've been doing a lot of thinking. Not a good thing when it comes to me, I realize, but nonetheless, I've been thinking a lot. And there's something that's been bothering me a lot lately, and I don't know if anybody really reads this blog, but I feel I need to get this off of my chest, and this is really the only means for me to do so. So, here we go.

Ok, let's start out with a question. I'll try to explain this as well as I can, but here goes: have you ever been in a situation, and then that situation happened to you again, but only the roles in the situation were reversed? That probably wasn't a great explanation, but I'll try to explain better again.

Alright, a few years ago, I, quite frankly and honestly, met a girl who's been nothing but amazing to me. We don't have a ton in common, but I truly thought it was one of those situations where opposites attracted, and I took quite a bit of time to get to know her even. We became incredibly close and we hung out and talked on the phone or on the computer for hours on end. However, when the time came for me to actually ask her out, she said no. Now, I don't hate her and I consider her one of my closest friends, but at the time, it really hurt me. And to be honest, I still really like her. But I guess after so long of liking her and nothing happening between us relationship-wise, I've grown to accept that we won't be together, at least as boyfriend and girlfriend. But that was a huge learning experience for me, definitely.

Odd as it may seem, this situation is happening with me......again. Except the roles are reversed. I wonder if M. Night Shyamalan is directing my life, because this has been a huge frickin' twist.

Long story short, it's now me that's not interested in the relationship. Well, I wouldn't say I'm not interested in a relationship, but...I don't know. There's this girl, who's pretty much everything I could want. She's sweet, funny, incredibly easy to talk to, and super trustworthy. However, for whatever reason, I have denied her the opportunity to date me. And, in all honesty, I'm not sure why.

It sounds ridiculous, I know, but I don't know. It makes sense to me, I guess. I'm kinda nervous about getting into a relationship to begin with, and the fact that there's a girl out there that really likes me that much is kinda scary to me, I guess. Frankly, I know I'm an imperfect person. I likely screw up on a constant basis, and sometimes, as self-depricating as this will probably sound, I honestly don't know what girls see in me. Well, maybe not to that extent, but I'm just super nervous about getting into a relationship, I suppose.

This blog hasn't really made much sense, I realize, and no offense is meant to the girls referred to in this blog, because I truly do love and care about them and I have no bad intentions with this blog. I realize there's no real solution to my situation, but I just felt the need to vent about things and as I said, I have a blog to do it in, so ha! :P But anyways, here's to better days, and thanks for reading.

Stay sweet.

-Creech