WATER, FIRE, AIR AND DIRT!

I Want A Girl With Good Dividends.

Alright, short blog this evening, because frankly, I'm tired as a motherf&@$er. Now, you ask "why are you blogging when you could be sleeping instead?" And to that I say..................




Goodnight.





Only joking.

Alright, as I said, I'll keep this brief. Tonight, I had planned to go see the supposed 12:00 premiere (this'll make sense in a few) of the film Dinner for Schmucks with my best friend and a few other friends of mine, but well, let's just say that, long story short, those plans kinda didn't happen. One friend was going with a cousin instead, and the other friend just.........well, wasn't going. So it was myself and two of my friends going to the theater, and super pumped about the movie. So, we get to the theater, and go in. We immediately notice something strange about the movie theater. Mainly that literally almost nobody is there. Regardless of this, we walk in and go to the theater. The guy working there politely (God bless him) tells us that the film is actually TOMORROW evening at midnight and that basically, we were 24 hours early to the film's premiere. We felt like schmucks. So, we did the logical thing after such a thing happened to us: we went and got dinner. Ah, the circle of life.

Well, anyways, we're trying again tomorrow. Hopefully this goes better than tonight. Alas, it was still an interesting night and definitely worth my time. I mean, I'm blogging at 2 in the morning about it, for God's sake. If that doesn't tell you about it, nothing well. But, now, I'm off to sleep. Stay sane, everyone.

Peace and love.

Just Remember To Always Think Twice. Don't Think Twice.

Ah, Billie Jean. Such conflicting lyrics. As the ones that title this evening's blog show. So, random question to start off this blog: is it arrogant of me to assume this blog is funny? Well, I used a tag for this blog titled "funny", which, in turn, is basically indirectly saying that you're going to find this blog amusing. And as the writer, it's my job to live up to that 5-letter tag's standards. So, in turn (that phrase is so cool to me), if this blog isn't funny, then my tag is a lie. However, due to false advertisement, you've read my blog in hopes of finding amusement, which isn't there. And that, my dear readers, is the magic of advertisement.

Yep, I'm improvising. Good of you to notice.

Right now, as I'm blogging, I'm listening to the Ying Yang Twins. I wish I were joking. Well, a friend of mine told me to listen to it, and I feel bad if I don't. Guilt and what have you. So I'm listening to it. It's the song "Salt Shaker." When I hear this song, I imagine a stereotypical rap video with shiny cars, a club perhaps, of course, DEM HOES. So, as I listen to this song, it's as though my home has been turned into a rap video. Bass booming. Cars driving around my house with ridiculous hydraulics. Perhaps a strobe light or two. Suggestive dancing by scantily clad females. Y'know. The usual. I'm trying not to type too loudly in hopes of not waking the bitches. Alas, if the music doesn't wake them, I say I'm doing alright. Moving right along then.

I'm getting decent at this whole ranting thing. I went into this blog without a plan. No set thing to type about, and look at all of that above this paragraph. Beautiful wall of text, is it not? The power of stream of consciousness writing, y'all.

So, for now, I'm going to finish off this blog for now. I'll try to be more persistant with my blogging from here on out. And yes, I'm aware that I say that often, but whatevs. It is what it is. I'll work on it.

Later, and until next time, shake it like a salt shaker:

It Is A.............Road That.............You GO?

I Don't Know Why I'm So Tongue-Tied.

Bonjourno. I think I spelled that right. If not, whatever. Anyways, I changed the name of this blog, again, in case you haven't noticed. I've decided to call it The Griffin's Nest. Why, you ask? Well, I have a Twitter account, which you might've known already if you looked over at the side of this blog's homepage because my Twitter feed, so to speak, is there. Anyways, my name on Twitter is goldengriffin90. To be absolutely honest with you, this has no meaning whatsoever. I didn't go to Canisius College (who's mascot is the Golden Griffin). It's not a lame nickname I had growing up. It's just something random I thought of and it sounded cool, hence why it's my Twitter username. The "90" in goldengriffin90, has significance, though. I was born in 1990. So there. I'm getting off track. As usual. Anyways, back to the point. I decided to change the name because I thought my old title was kinda lame, and my first title (Tales of Misfortune, anyone?) sounded incredibly depressing, and sure, I may have a few blogs that aren't happy sounding, but this blog isn't a frickin' funeral dirge. So, in that sense, I think this new name is a pretty solid name. Sure, it probably seemingly makes no sense whatsoever to most, even after my explanation, but it sounds cool.

Right?

Right.

Here's a link to a picture of a golden griffin. Yes, the link has it spelled "griffon", but trust me, they're wrong. Here it is: http://butterflyeater.com/Golden_Griffon_by_Kipestshin.jpg

More debauchery to come later. Promise.

Later! :D

-Creech.

John Mayer Has A TV Show.

Indeed he does. Well, did. For one day. But this video is incredibly funny to me. So watch it. :D


John Mayer Has A TV Show (VH1 )
Uploaded by Cehcw. - Watch more comedy videos and sitcoms.

She's Lost Control Again.

Good day to you! So, today's blog is going to be happy for a change. Shocking, right. Though the title of today's blog is from a Joy Division song, which is probably one of the most depressing blog. Today's blog is FULL OF IRONY!! WHAT A TWIST!!!

*ahem*

Anyways, lately, I've been watching the show Undercover Boss. Basically, the premise of the show is this: a CEO of the company goes "undercover", so to speak, into the company they work for, and they try to see what the job is like, and then change things about the company accordingly. But, if you've ever seen commercials for this show, they always make a really crappy pun or play on words about the career and how it's not like they thought it would be. Here's an example: "the CEO of White Castle goes undercover, and finds that working in fast food is more than burgers than fries" or something along the lines of that. Well, I've been trying to think of some of my own terrible puns, hoping maybe CBS will use them for the next season of the show. If it makes it to a second season, I mean. It's not a very good show. But anyways, here's one I thought of:

The CEO of Lays goes undercover to find that the job isn't all that and a bag of chips.

Sound good?

I'll be waiting, America's Most Watched Network.

-Creech.

lol wut

This song is hilarious. Credit to my friend Taylor Smyth for informing me of this, but now I shall share this with you. Try not to laugh. :D

I Have A Forty-Four Dollar Haircut!

Hi. So, remember that last blog where I fawned over a girl that I liked? Yeah, that's not gonna happen. More specifically, she isn't interested in me. Which is fine. It happens, you know? Not every girl that I'm attracted to is going to run to me, and I completely realize and accept that. However, when you decide to take a girl out on a date to a rather awesome restaurant (Applebee's FTW.) AND to a movie (Avatar FTW.), that tends to send the signal that maybe, just MAYBE, you might be slightly interested in them. And most of the time, it's not considered polite to essentially ignore that person after said date.

Then, when one of my incredibly close friends decides to have one of his friends ask this girl about the situation, you tell them that you aren't interested in me AND that you like someone else. Super. You could've just told me "Hey, I had a great time, but I don't think we're going to be together" or whatever, but no. You decide to say absolutely NOTHING to me. And the fact that I have to find out your deal is through a forwarded text message from my friend doesn't exactly ease the pain, so to speak.

Now, I'm not trying to say that you broke my heart or anything like that, and I personally don't think I'm being too overdramatic here. If you weren't interested in me that way, you should've just told me. I wouldn't have been hurt (well, at least not as much as I am now, anyways) if you'd have just said that. And if you knew you weren't interested in me before our date, then you should've just said that beforehand and I would've been totally cool with that. But instead, you don't say anything, which already makes me think I did something wrong and all has gone to hell. So, I'm not really mad or anything like that, because it's an absolute waste of energy to be upset and all anger does in situations like this is cause more trouble. I'm just saying, as childish as this sounds, that you have officially hurt my feelings by your actions (or lack thereof, I guess in this case). So, if that was your goal, then mission freakin' accomplished.

And people wonder why I have a lack of confidence with females.

Rant over.

Your Mom Goes To College.

This video needs no explanation. One of the funniest clips, if not the funniest clip, from the film Napoleon Dynamite.

Enjoy.



-Creech.

Doin' Stuff With The Food.

Hello.

So, I recently borrowed the 1st season of Flight of the Conchords from my friend Chris, who is borrowing it from my friend Mitch. Complicated triangle of DVD viewing, isn't it? I'm not sure if that made sense. But anyways, I watched the 1st season of FOTC, and lemme tell ya: it's tremendous. The way they mix their songs in with the hilarious ridiculous stories they have is hilarious. One of the funniest songs on Flight of the Conchords was a song, oddly enough, by a band that isn't FOTC. A band featuring comedians Todd Barry and Demetri Martin, called the Crazy Dogggz (3 g's and a z). You'd likely have to watch the episode of FOTC featuring this song to get the gist of what's going on, but basically:

Todd is a bongo player who Murray, the band's manager, invited to join Flight of the Conchords, but Bret and Jemaine (Flight of the Conchords), want Todd out after he plays ridiculous bongo solos. Eventually, the bands goes to fire Todd, but Todd convinces Jemaine to fire Bret instead. Bret starts a new band with Demetri, a keytar player. The two bands, known as Flight of the Conchords and the Original Flight of the Conchords, play a few gigs together, and then eventually, Todd and Demitri decide to form their own band, called the Crazy Dogggz. They perform the following song, Doggy Bounce. And hilarity ensues:



So, yeah, Flight of the Conchords is great. Check it out for yourself if you can. You won't regret it. Promise.

-Creech.

The Meaning of Life is to Give Life Meaning.

In my journeys across cyberspace, I come across a large amount of things. This video is one of them, courtesy of The Onion:

Enjoy.


Ford Unveils New Car For Cash-Strapped Buyers: The 1993 Taurus

-Creech

Am I Moving In Slow Motion?

Greetings, and Happy Halloween to all. So, I'm going to be completely honest here: I have nothing blogworthy to share with you today. Except for the fact that I made up a new word: blogworthy. I should patent that shit. Anyways, I can't really think of anything to blog about at the moment, but then again, it is 1 in the morning and I'm quite sleepy. So maybe that factors in. I don't really know. I ain't a scientist. Anyways, this is another one of those "nothing to blog about, so I'll ramble" blogs that most people have come to know all too well here on TOM. Again, that's a great acronym, ain't it? TOM = Tales of Misfortune, just so ya know. But you knew that! Alas, I digress. So, I apologize for wasting your time with an absolutely pointless blog.

You're welcome.

Enjoy the holiday.

-Creech.

This Video Literally Made My Day.

Not much description needed. This is from the show Operation Repo on TruTV. And it's one of the funniest things I think I've ever seen in a long time. Credit goes to Matthew Hayes for finding this and posting it on Facebook. Enjoy.




-Creech

Def Poetry Jam #2!

I am nonexistant
I am never there
I'm tired of pretending
Pretending I don't care
I am in a lonely place
I am with my friends
Feeling like I can't escape
From those whom I depend on

I am the toxic fumes in the atmosphere
Responsible for global warming, so they say
I am the sun and it's rather warm embrace
Telling you it's time to start the day
I am the rain on a summer afternoon
Falling like tiny missiles from the sky
I am the baptized man cleansed of all decay
Though I do not know the reasons why

I am isolated
From all my doubts in fears
If I just ignore them
It's like they were never here
I am everything at once
In the universe
Things will likely get better
Before they get worse

I am the combine that harvests all the crops
Getting your work done before the game
I am the parachute pants in your closet
That you don't wear 'cause your friends think they're lame
I am the wings on a bald eagle
Helping the icon of America to fly
I am the sun as it shines upon the world
Though I do not know the reasons why

I am sleeping right now
I cannot hear your words
Counting sheep has bored me
Some might call me disturbed
You are right beside me
Though, you're truly far away
Everything is jumbled inside
I can't find the words to say

I am the toxic fumes inside the atmosphere
That cause the acid rain to fall down from the sky
I am the sun and it's nonexistant face
Watching the world as it starts up the day
I am the rain on a summer afternoon
As noticeable as a battle cry
I am the baptized man cleansed of all decay
And thankfully, I know the reasons why

I've Got Nothing To Say.

Well, the title of this entry should tell you all you need to know about this......entry. Yeah. In all honesty, I have nothing to say. Not literally "nothing," but I don't have any exciting stories from today or anything. Cool? Cool.

Now, you're probably wondering, "Well, if you don't have anything to say, what is this even about?" To be honest with you, the main reason I'm posting is this: this entry will be my 10th of the month, which breaks my previous record of.......whatever my previous record was. I think 9. But don't quote me on that. (Note: you can quote me on that. It's totally true. =D) And I also believe that I had that number in August. But don't quote me on that either. (Note: you can quote me on that as well. Totally truthful. =D)

So, mainly, I just posted this so I would have a month in which I had a double-digit number of blog entries.

Mission accomplished.

-Creech.

Another Long Delayed Blog.

Alright, so I've come to the conclusion that I am terrible at keeping a blog. I simply am horrendous at it. I haven't posted anything on here in a long time, but frankly, I have been busy living my life. And, boy, do I have stories! Well, not particularly interesting stories, but stories nonetheless. Should be interesting. I'll share these stories in the coming days and weeks in this blog. I'm busy currently with quite a bit of college homework, so whenever I get some free time, I will get on posting more blogs. And trust me, they will be more interesting than this one.

Keep the faith.

-Creech

Are We Human or Are We Dancer?

Greetings again. Good to see you've returned. Hopefully. Or not. :( Whichever. I suppose if no one reads this, I'll just continue shouting into the wind and hope someone hears me. Terrible analogy. Anyways, what is this blog even about? As I said in the first post (remember that? :D), this blog really has no point. It's just a way for me to get out my thoughts on random subjects, and to vent about stuff that's been bothering me. Well, not necessarily "bothering" me, but stuff that's been on my mind and all that. So yeah, this blog's kinda pointless, really, to anybody but me and perhaps people who don't know me all that well. And even to people that do. Well, I guess that would include everybody. But whatever! Haha.

Anywho, also as stated earlier, I graduated high school in May of this year. It was fantastic. Most people wonder what the "life of a high school graduate" has in store. Do you have to carry your high school diploma everywhere? Do you move out the day of your open house? Can you cook Spaghetti O's in the oven? All of these questions are brought up when a student graduates high school. Well, not necessarily, but that's besides the point.

So, later tonight, I will post a blog about the "life of a high school graduate". Which is what I'm living. It'll be like a journal, so to speak, of my day overall. Should be fun. Hope you enjoy it.

Much love.

-Creech

TGI Friday's?

Well, I realize my last blog was kinda depressing and not that happy (which would be depressing, but whatever), so I figured that I would bring a more lighthearted and hopefully somewhat amusing blog to this site. Hope you enjoy it.

Now, you're probably wondering "what in the hell is up with the random title?" Well, it's not a random title, first of all. I actually will be discussing TGI Friday's in this blog. A rather trivial subject to discuss, indeed, but anyways, I digress.

This likely leads to your second question: "what about TGI Friday's?" Well, allow this article to explain, courtesy of RedOrbit.com:

CARROLLTON, Texas, Sept. 4 /PRNewswire/ -- T.G.I. Friday's restaurants, in a friendly bet with its self-proclaimed #1 fan, has agreed to let "Woody" give away either a Jack Daniel's(R) Burger or a Jack Daniel's(R) Chicken Sandwich to the first 500,000 people who become his fan on Facebook (www.facebook.com/fanwoody) prior to September 30, 2009 if he reaches the 500,000 fan mark. Fans must register with an email address in order to receive a coupon.

"With millions of T.G.I. Friday's fans, it's not easy to determine Friday's #1 Fan. Woody says he's the one and we're going to let him prove it," said Andrew Jordan, senior vice president of marketing for T.G.I. Friday's. "Every day, Woody finds a reason to celebrate. He makes life a party, which makes him a perfect fit for T.G.I. Friday's. He says he can get half a million Facebook fans in 30 days. We agreed to the Jack Daniel's giveaway when he does it," Jordan added. "Only Friday's has Woody and only Friday's has the famous Jack Daniel's Grill."


"T.G.I. Friday's was way cool even before they agreed to let me give away Jack Daniel's burgers and Jack Daniel's Chicken Sandwiches," said Woody. "But I need your help to win this bet. I need you to be my fan on Facebook. If you're one of the first half a million to be my Facebook fan, we'll celebrate together in mid-October with a free Jack Daniel's burger or a Jack Daniel's Chicken sandwich."

Sounds pretty simple, right? Just become a fan of this Woody fellow on Facebook, and you get a free sandwich. Well, it is simple! So, with me having Facebook, I decided to become a fan of this Woody gentleman.

This is where the story goes bad. Haha.

Not only do I find out he has already surpassed the half-million fans needed to give out free burgers, but I also find out you need to be 21 years old to obtain the coupon for the burger. FML, right?! Well, not really. After all, it's just a sandwich. A delicious, mouthwatering, Jackburger..........damn it! Well, it's no big deal. What in the hell is a Jackburger, anyways? Oh well, my luck, I suppose.

Apparently, the fan contest has been raised to a million fans who can get free burgers from TGI Friday's, so if you're interested and have Facebook, go to http://www.facebook.com/fanwoody. There, you can register for a burger! Or not, if you don't want. Or can't, like me.

Life sucks sometimes. :D

-Creech

Boredom Blog

Hello there. Yeah, I'm sitting at home incredibly bored at the moment, so I'm blogging. How lame am I? Haha. But eh, it's whatever. Am I really the lame one though? Well, that's another discussion for another time.

Anyways, as I said, I'm at home. Not the most exciting place to be, but it's not horrendously boring, I guess. Also, it's storming right now. Or at least it was. I've never been the biggest fan of storms. They either take out my power and upset me or don't last very long and end up being incredibly inconsequential. There are a lot of people who are like "OMG like, I LOVE STORMS!!!!!!!! They're so pretty!" and all that, but yeah, not me. I'm just like "Damn lightning took out my power. Now I can't play Wii." Such is my life, I suppose.

The part I hate most of storms is tornadoes. Now, I've never experienced one in my life (shocking, really), but I've seen the film Twister enough times to know that I want nothing to do with one. Although it would be pretty amusing to me if I randomly saw a tornado pick up a cow and send it flying into the air. I don't know. I have a notoriously odd sense of humor though. It's just me. But I strongly dislike tornadoes.

This blog was incredibly pointless. But as I said, I'm bored and it's storming, so boredom + storm = a blog about being bored and storms. So here you are. Enjoy the storm.

It's a celebration.

-Creech